The Thrill of the Struggle

We each face the massive task of rebuilding our lives. 

The attitude that you bring to this task will determine whether you succeed, and it will define the coming months and years.

We’ve been through our once-in-a-lifetime disaster, along with the tectonic shift to our daily lives and our expectations.  Some of us have endured huge challenges to our businesses, or we’ve doubled up as a provider AND teacher for our children, or we’ve been alone and keenly felt the absence of friends and family, or we’ve seen our livelihoods taken away entirely and had to find new ways to make ends meet.  Some of us have been hit with several layers to the hardship of the past year.

And now, having survived all of that, you have to rebuild.  Impress your employer to make sure you keep your job.  Find a new job in a flooded marketplace.  Take your staff off furlough and pitch for business again, knowing that a lot of people will be cautious in their spending.  Rebuild friendships and connections with people you haven’t seen for a year.

Some people are going to serenely sail out of this storm.  For example, the very wealthy or those with essential, niche jobs.  There will be stress, but they won’t experience existential fear.  The rest of us will step out of lockdown, blinking in the sunlight, trying to work out what to do next.

A lot of people will take time to adjust and adapt.  Those who succeed, who come out on top, are going to come out running.

When faced with a difficult situation, attitude is everything.

Most people are going to try to get their lives back, to fight the changes that have happened, complaining that things are hard.  They will endure hard things.  Maybe they’ll succeed, maybe they’ll fail, but they will be gritting their teeth, saying how hard it is, waiting for the weekend, waiting for their holidays, waiting for 5pm so they can stop and take it easy again.

Others will be outcome-driven.  They will calculate their optimal path and then do what is necessary.  Saving money?  Ok I can do that.  Impressing my boss?  Ok I’ll do a good job with that presentation.  Rebuilding my business?  I’ll look at events and opportunities, reach out to some old contacts.  This is a smart approach, and with a clear result in mind, it’s more likely to succeed.

What all these people forget, and what can easily slip our minds, is the love of the struggle.  The passion for doing what is hard.  The bared-teeth, heart-thumping rush of men and women who are working hard, intentionally throwing themselves into hardship and challenge, for the love of it.  It’s a component that can so easily be overlooked, or feel too hard when we’re already tired, bruised, dizzy from a long bout.  But the passion will make the difference.

You know your challenges right now.  What are they?  What are you driven to fix, or change, or break through, or build?

Write them down.  Be specific, write down exactly what success will look like for you, in 12 months’ time.

Don’t be conservative, don’t hold back.  I know you’re tired.  I know the last year has been hard.  But this is a new chapter.  When you look back, this will be the chapter of your life where you surged out of lockdown and rose to new highs by daring yourself to dream.  Seize hold of your ambition, your will, your needs and longings and values, and rediscover those embers of passion that are waiting in your heart.  Blow on them.  Feed them.  Dream, vision, write down goals and ideas for where you want to be in 12 months.

Mindfulness is essential for this to work.  You will need to be present in order to feel your passion.  So a morning meditation practice is a good idea.

Then, feed your hunger.  Feed your passion.  Step into difficult situations, things you aren’t sure if you can handle, and stay present and mindful.  Fear will be there with you, so acknowledge your fear but hold on to your passion.  Let your passion grow stronger than your fear.

We’re looking to foster a warrior’s soul.  A warrior laughs at danger, death and hardship.  When I am at the gym, when I realise I’ve given almost everything my body can give, when I shake and feel like I might throw up, I laugh.  This is being alive.  Not playing it safe, not doing what is needed and then returning to my comfort zome.  This, the risk and the peril and the not-knowing.  This is being alive.

It is ok to be unsafe, when that is your choice.  There will be time for rest, and play, and gentle connecting, and appreciating the beauty of life.  But there is also a time to get into the ring, to be on the path, to be afraid but determined, to remember how good it can feel to pour passion into a project.

Set your goals.  Stoke your ambition.  Rouse your warrior’s heart.  And begin proudly walking into danger.